I woke up today and decided to give myself permission. It’s something I haven’t allowed myself to do for a long time, maybe even most of my life. I say that I am looking forward to retirement because with it, comes freedom. But I am beginning to realize it is more than freedom. I have opened my mind again to allow myself time to create, learn and grow. Sitting at home today I realized what I was doing was giving myself permission to enjoy life on my own terms.
When we first moved here and Paul started playing more golf I found myself with long stretches of free time on the weekends. At first I was running around doing chores, laundry, and errands. Then at some point I asked my husband, how do you not feel guilty about spending 4-5 hours when there is so much to be done. It was a bit of a wakeup call when he said, “because I enjoy it”. He apparently didn’t inherit the guilt gene.
I think that was when I realized that I don’t allow myself much enjoyment. I got trapped in a cycle of school, careers, raising children and just trying to keep all the plates in the air that I forgot to take the time to stop and smell the roses. So today on a lazy long weekend I am giving myself permission to:
- Relax on the patio
- Photograph the birds
- Write this blog
- Eat that piece of blueberry bread
- Do yoga and stop when I am tired
- Read a book
- Watch HGTV
- Color with my watercolor pens
- Gaze out the window
- Sit and think and do nothing
The list is long and I could keep on going. I hope you’ll make a list of the things you give yourself permission to do that make you happy. Even when you are running crazy, raising kids with a stressful job, give yourself permission to make a little time for yourself and brush that guilt away.
Dog lover, nature seeker, artist wanna be